A few years ago at a pastor’s retreat I was given a prayer journal, and at the bottom of each page is a Scripture verse and at the top of each page is a prayer. Today at our church’s Monday morning prayer time, I started using this journal to write down people’s various petitions. This was the prayer at the top of the page this morning:
“I am so weak, God. You promised me that Your power is made perfect in weakness–that Your grace is all I need. Here, God. I put my weakness in Your hands. Use it however You want. May Your grace fill my life.”
This prayer is a sigh. It’s the groan of a weary heart.
I admit, this is how I have been feeling lately: tired, weary, irritable, weak.
It’s hard to admit these things sometimes. Ironically, it’s even harder as a Christian and as a pastor. Because we can feel this internal pressure to be up. Or to have things together. To appear faith-full.
Ok, I should be honest: I can feel this way.
Even pastors need a space to admit weariness and weakness. Even I do.